The Waterfront

The beauty of a Lake Champlain sunset fills me with awe.

I've seen many sunsets here in my 53 years.
As I watch the changing light and colors,  it brings me back to other sunsets.
It brings me back to other times in my life.

 As a fifteen year old with thoughts of friends, crushes, fears and triumphs...

As an eighteen year old trying to envision my future in college and beyond...

As a 22 year about to move away from home, full of uncertainty and hope, fear and excitement...

As a 25 year old with my new husband looking forward to our life together...

As a 40 year old watching the same awe in the eyes of my children...

And in my 50's, with hopes for the futures of my children and an ache for the past when my parents were alive and life was not so complicated.

Throughout the years, the lake has helped me put life into perspective.
As you sit and watch the sun sink below the horizon
bringing the darkness of night,
you see the colors are constantly changing.
Just when you think it can't possibly get any prettier, it does.

When the clouds are present,  it makes the sky even more colorful and glorious.

And on rainy days when the colors over the lake are more gloomy,
you might just turn around to leave and see that they have just moved
to a different place in the sky... 

Then, when driving back to real life once again, up the hill,
you see the clouds have cleared and the sky is the bluest blue,
causing you to catch your breath once again with the beauty of it all.

Being here grounds me, calms me, and gives me hope for a bright future.

With certainty, I know I will be back again.

The Masks We Wear

We all do it.
We all wear masks.
For one reason or another.

Throughout my life, I have worn many masks.

As a child, I was very shy. 
I saw this as a flaw. 
After all, my teachers were quick to point it out on almost every report card.
I tried to wear a mask of self-confidence back then, but I know I wasn't very good at it.

As my life went on, I became much better at wearing masks.
I think we all do.

Masks of happiness when everything in life seems like it is crashing down on us.
Masks of confidence in the face of uncertainty.
Masks of indifference when we feel hurt or friends let us down.

How many of us would go out in public without make-up on?
There are so many ways we hide our true selves!

BUT, wearing these masks constantly causes us to feel alone. A popular quote says "You are only ever loved to the extent that you are known". We cannot feel loved for who we really are as long as we are not known as we really are. At the same time, we fear that if we expose our true selves we will be rejected.

I've been doing a lot of photography this summer - many senior portraits.
I get nervous every single time.
There are so many unknowns. 
I want so much to make each of these kids look good.
If they knew how anxious I really am, they would never want me taking their pictures.
They would never trust me with the job.
So I wear my photographer mask - a mask that I am confident and calm and know exactly what I'm doing!  If only they knew!
But as the summer went on,  I needed my mask less and less because I had actually gained REAL confidence.  The mask is not totally gone, but I'm getting there!

Writing this blog serves many purposes in my life.
One of these is letting the world know my true self - the real me.
Some people can't understand this.
They ask why I would want to talk about personal things in such a public way.

I guess it's my way of taking off my masks.
And it feels good.

In My Head

I'm so glad the summer is coming to an end.

I hope Ali likes her pictures.

I can't wait for the fall TV shows to start.

The dogs need a bath.

I will not put on my winter weight this year.

I wish I liked coffee.

September 27 - October 2 will be so much fun!

I'm sick of political ads already.

If Linda McMahon calls one more time...

I love my new sweater.

My garden needs work.

The bird feeders are running low.

I need to exercise more.

I love my Sanuks.

My new bathrooms make me feel happy.

I need to paint the trim.

Why doesn't Momo come in when she's sitting at the door?

The bananas are getting spotted.

Momo and Halle need vet appointments.

I'm glad Kerry came home for the weekend.

I'm not going outside again until the humidity goes away!

I'm excited that Hali is writing a blog.

I wish Vance could relax more.

I need to get more editing done.

I need to set up more photo sessions.

I need to clean the bathroom.

What will we eat for dinner tonight?

Who will Kelly's new co-host be?

I need to clean the kitchen.

I need a shower.

I can't wait to have fried dough at the Four Town Fair.

I wonder what Annie's college essay will be about.

I love that fall coat in the catalog I got yesterday.

Maddie makes me laugh.

What book will I read next?

I need to begin going to bed earlier and getting up earlier.

Why do so many squirrels keep running in front of my car?

Kerry doesn't have a garbage disposal...

The grapes are nice and crispy lately.

Macoun apples will be ready to pick soon.

Will we have a fall storm this year?

I love autumn.

Will Annie be in a good mood today?

The dogs need brushing.

Why does Maddie LEAP out the door instead of walk?

I love sleeping with the windows open.

I saw a maple tree with orange leaves already.

I need to listen to the news more.

I need to read the newspaper more.

I'm so happy I am so busy with photography.

I wish I had more free time.

We need parsley.

I shouldn't be taking so much time writing this blog.

Firsts and Lasts

As I walked my doggies this morning in the cool autumn air, I did a lot of reminiscing.  Today is the first day of school in our town.  Vance and I have just sent our last child off to school for her last year of high school.

The last first day of school that we will be a part of.

It has been a tradition since Adam began school many years ago. 
Daddy delays going to work that day to send them off. 
In our family, everything revolves around pictures,
so of course we take pictures every year!

The large neighborhood gathering at the bus stop from years past
is now a gathering of one.
Adam and Kerry are at college.
Neighbors kids are grown up.
The school bus comes later, but there is only one house with young children anymore.

 This is the way it was.  Adam acting happy and brave, but running to the bathroom the minute before the bus came due to his internal strife.  There's no hiding how Kerry felt and still does to some extent!  And Annie, happy and excited to be going off to face new adventures and meet new people.

This was Annie's first day of Kindergarten - pink backpack, friendship bracelet around the ankle from endless summer days at the swim club, and a smile.  The only reason she looked back at all was because she loved to have her picture taken!

 Keeping to our tradition, we took pictures this morning.

 Then she hurried off to school, excited to be back with her friends and see her teachers.

Annie has the same smile on her face that she did 13 years ago.

This will be a year of lasts. 
To be followed by a years of firsts.

I remember back in the days when life was filled with firsts, I read a poem about motherhood.  It told about how a child's "first" everything is so celebrated but the "lasts" just seems to happen without much notice. 

How many of us remember the last time we rocked our children to sleep?
Or the last time our children said "twee" for "tree"?
Or the last time we woke to one of our children standing by our bed after a nightmare, wanting to crawl in next to us for comfort?
The last time we left cookies out for Santa?
The last time we braided our daughter's hair?

I guess it's because we always expect things to happen again.

So when we KNOW a "last" is happening, we'd better take notice!
And celebrate!
Because just as "firsts" mark a time of growth in our children,
so do "lasts".

They just carry a different kind of emotion!

Only in Burlington

We made a quick trip to my hometown yesterday to bring Kerry back to school at UVM.

Kerry slept almost the whole trip, clutching her pillow and her iPhone.

After moving her into her apartment in this brand new apartment building on campus,
we headed downtown for a bite to eat before heading back home.

Burlington was swamped with people since it was move-in day for UVM.
We had to park in the parking garage near Church Street.
As we parked, Kerry caught a glimpse of something new...

The alleyway from the parking garage to Church Street was covered in a gorgeous mural!

 The mural was commissioned to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Church Street Marketplace.
It depicts the history of Vermont in a very fun and entertaining way.  I could have studied it for hours!

 Local businesses are represented along with QR codes which can be scanned with your iPhone to give you information, menus, etc.

 Here is Maria Von Trapp with her guitar.

 I wish I knew who everyone was, but I could spot Bernie Sanders and Olympic skier Barbara Cochran.  THE HOT DOG LADY even made in onto the mural - she's the white haired lady with the pink jacket standing next to Senator Patrick Leahy!

There are going to be maps with keys to who everyone is - I can't wait to see one!

For those of you who grew up in Burlington  and now live elsewhere, here is a news report on the mural.  I think you'll find it interesting!

http://www.wcax.com/story/19277268/new-mural-paints-a-picture-of-burlingtons-history

This is a fun picture of Vance and Kerry walking down the alleyway into the sun.

So,  next we sat down to eat outside at the Asiana Noodle Shop.

 We all had extremely good meals (teriyaki chicken and rice).

As we ate, we were entertained first by this old man with his guitar...

He was missing a few teeth, but he was playing his heart out for the little boy (far left).  I think he was scaring him a little, as the boy's father (the shirtless man with the tattoo of a monkey riding a bike on his back) looked on!

Then, a few minutes later, another group set up next to us.  A shirtless man with a vest playing guitar while a girl (woman?) with green hair adorned by a large gold bow, andgold hi-top sneakers played accordian.  They both sang!  Such a treat!

Only in Burlington!

As we walked back to our car, we spotted my Uncle Jack's car and went over to say hello to him and my Aunt Connie.  It was good to see them!

 It was getting late and we had a long trip home, so we brought Kerry back to her apartment and said good-bye.

There she is, waiting for the elevator to take her up to the 5th floor.
I still feel sad whenever I drop her off.  I already miss her!

But I look forward to many trips this year to visit her and Adam, watch her play softball, and parent's weekend in October.

It gives me a reason to go home again.

Chums

Everybody needs a best friend - someone who "gets" you.

A confidant, ally, comrade, sidekick, pal, wingman, bosom buddy.

Kerry and Jojo are all of the above and more.

It's fun to be around them when they're feeling silly...

And even when they're not.

The other day,  Jojo was in a bad mood.
Kerry can be rather irritating sometimes,
especially when you don't feel like laughing.
Kerry kept looking at Jojo and repeating "Why so glum, chum?"
It made me smile.
It took Jojo a little longer than me,
but after enough repetitions, a little bit of the glumness went away.

That's just how Kerry is.

She wears you down by being so irritating - and funny!

For instance, I can't count how many times this summer she donned her black glasses
and her pillow and asked"What animal do I look like?"

The answer is "A giant squid", but she keeps asking until you answer her!


Jojo and Kerry have fun together, whether they're giving a friend a wedgy...

playing volleyball...

or just hanging out watching TV (which they do A LOT)
.

There is no doubt in my mind that their friendship will stand the test of time.

because they are chums.

Best chums.

Find a Penny, Pick it Up...

I haven't been writing as often lately because I've been so busy taking pictures.
When I started my photography business, I never dreamed I would be getting so many calls.
I'm not complaining.
But for the rest of the summer until school begins, I just have to let certain things slide.
Like housework, yard work, and this blog.

The other day, as I was doing a photo session for Allison in a nearby old town, we ventured into the site of a building that had been taken down.  As we were walking across the rubble toward the brick wall pictured above, I saw what looked like an old dime.  I didn't have my glasses on, so I couldn't really see it very well.  I put it in my pocket.

Yesterday I remembered it was there and showed it to Kerry and Annie.
Kerry looked at it and said it looks like a penny from the year 1891!

We thought for sure it was worth something!
Kerry immediately googled it and found it was worth 200x its original value.
$2.00

Our excitement quickly faded.

Then I started thinking about how old it was, and
wondered what was going on in the world when this penny was shiny and new.

This is what I discovered:

- Benjamin Harrison was president
- Wyoming became a state
-  James Naismith, a YMCA instructor in Springfield, MA created the game of basketball.
   The first basketball game was played by 18 students at Springfield College.
-  Carnegie Hall opened its doors
-  Thomas Edison patented the motion picture camera
-  Thomas Edison patented "transmission of signals electrically" (Radio)
-  Stanford University opened
-  The first gasoline powered car debuts in Springfield, MA
-  The Wrigley Company was founded
-  The first electric oven was made
-  W.L. Judson invented the zipper
-  The first submarine was invented in Holland

 Pretty cool to consider what life was like for the people that carried this penny around in 1891.

What will I do with it?

I think I'll save it for my grandkids.
Maybe one of them will love history.

Or maybe by then it will be worth more - like $3.00?

My Friend Joyce

A year ago I wrote a post about a beautiful woman that I know.  At a young age of 70, she knew the end of her life was nearing from years of smoking.  She asked me to tell everyone I know not to smoke.  Here is a link to that post: Joyce

I saw Joyce a few more times in the fall.  When Tigger was lost, she was very concerned and I'm sure she spent many hours looking out her back window into the woods, hoping to spot him.  She told me that she tossed her leftover meatballs and food out the back window and Tigger would often come by for a snack.  That explained why he never lost weight, no matter how much we cut down on his food portions at home!

Over the winter, I spotted her outside on her front porch on one of those really nice, warm winter days and stopped to chat.  She was always cheerful and happy to see me and asked if Tigger had ever come home. 

I haven't seen her outside lately, but then again, I haven't been walking the dogs as often as I should.
Last night, I saw her next door neighbor.  After chatting for a while about the kids, I asked her how Joyce was doing.  This is when I found out she passed away in April.  I was hit by a deep sense of sadness. I was so sorry that I didn't know.  I don't read the obituaries. 

Joyce loved life.  She loved people.  She loved animals. 

I will always remember her, waving me down so she could give the dogs a cookie.  I will remember her warm smile and laughter - a very hearty smokers laugh with a little crackly sound in it! And especially how she talked nonstop, hardly taking a breath between sentences.

Most of all, I will remember how, no matter how sick she got and no matter what hand she was dealt, she remained positive and appreciated the world around her and the life she had left.

Here is a picture of Joyce and a paragraph from her obituary:

 

Family was important to Joyce, and she enjoyed making those around her happy. She was happiest spending time with her grandchildren, and traveling with her husband. She was famous for her homemade sauce and delicious lasagna, which was served at every family gathering. She had a unique way of making everyone around her feel special. Joyce appreciated nature, and enjoyed gardening and watching the wildlife that flourished around her home. Joyce had a beautiful smile, and lived life to the fullest everyday she was on this earth. She gave to others, and expected nothing in return.

So, in her memory, I am taking this chance once again to ask anyone out there who smokes and believes even for a moment that you will be the one to escape any consequences to think again.