For the first 50 years of my life, my perfectionist self mistakenly believed it was all about knowing more, getting it right, planning, attempting to prevent bad things from happening, and keeping all of my chicks in a row. It took me this long to discover that the JOURNEY is all that matters. This quote from Gilda Radner sums it all up:

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
"


Saturday, July 14, 2012

My Friend Joyce

A year ago I wrote a post about a beautiful woman that I know.  At a young age of 70, she knew the end of her life was nearing from years of smoking.  She asked me to tell everyone I know not to smoke.  Here is a link to that post: Joyce

I saw Joyce a few more times in the fall.  When Tigger was lost, she was very concerned and I'm sure she spent many hours looking out her back window into the woods, hoping to spot him.  She told me that she tossed her leftover meatballs and food out the back window and Tigger would often come by for a snack.  That explained why he never lost weight, no matter how much we cut down on his food portions at home!

Over the winter, I spotted her outside on her front porch on one of those really nice, warm winter days and stopped to chat.  She was always cheerful and happy to see me and asked if Tigger had ever come home. 

I haven't seen her outside lately, but then again, I haven't been walking the dogs as often as I should.
Last night, I saw her next door neighbor.  After chatting for a while about the kids, I asked her how Joyce was doing.  This is when I found out she passed away in April.  I was hit by a deep sense of sadness. I was so sorry that I didn't know.  I don't read the obituaries. 

Joyce loved life.  She loved people.  She loved animals. 

I will always remember her, waving me down so she could give the dogs a cookie.  I will remember her warm smile and laughter - a very hearty smokers laugh with a little crackly sound in it! And especially how she talked nonstop, hardly taking a breath between sentences.

Most of all, I will remember how, no matter how sick she got and no matter what hand she was dealt, she remained positive and appreciated the world around her and the life she had left.

Here is a picture of Joyce and a paragraph from her obituary:

 Joyce Krol

Family was important to Joyce, and she enjoyed making those around her happy. She was happiest spending time with her grandchildren, and traveling with her husband. She was famous for her homemade sauce and delicious lasagna, which was served at every family gathering. She had a unique way of making everyone around her feel special. Joyce appreciated nature, and enjoyed gardening and watching the wildlife that flourished around her home. Joyce had a beautiful smile, and lived life to the fullest everyday she was on this earth. She gave to others, and expected nothing in return.

So, in her memory, I am taking this chance once again to ask anyone out there who smokes and believes even for a moment that you will be the one to escape any consequences to think again.  


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