For the first 50 years of my life, my perfectionist self mistakenly believed it was all about knowing more, getting it right, planning, attempting to prevent bad things from happening, and keeping all of my chicks in a row. It took me this long to discover that the JOURNEY is all that matters. This quote from Gilda Radner sums it all up:

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
"


Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Until

I had always considered myself a healthy person.
UNTIL.

There have been too many little "untils" over the years.

UNTIL I got mono my senior year of college.
UNTIL I had trouble having children.
UNTIL I miscarried.
UNTIL I had carpal tunnel in my wrists.
UNTIL I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease.
UNTIL I had heart palpitations from Mitral Valve Prolapse.
UNTIL I couldn't run anymore because my feet hurt.
UNTIL I developed allergies to sulfites and couldn't drink any alcohol anymore.
UNTIL I developed allergies to red dye in food.
UNTIL the skin around my eyes got puffy and itchy and I didn't know why.
UNTIL I had frequent bladder infections and sinus infections.
UNTIL my fingernails were dry, brittle and full of ridges.
UNTIL I couldn't ride for an hour in the car without falling asleep.
UNTIL my eyes were so dry at night it hurt to open them in the morning.
UNTIL my legs were swelling, leaving sock line indentations and itching at night.
UNTIL my memory was so bad that my husband started leaving little to-do notes for me.

UNTIL.

These things didn't happen all at once.
They happened over the course of 25 - 30 years.
But they kept happening.
How could such a healthy person have so many little health issues?????

It's possible it was  all been related to one thing.
HYPOTHYROIDISM.

Did my doctor discover it? No.

Last year, my teen-age daughter got mono during her first year of college and it wasn't getting any better after 2 months.  She had so many strange symptoms.  And she was tired. So her pediatrician did blood work and threw in a thyroid test just in case.   BINGO.

After researching the condition for her, I realized I was reading about myself.

Thyroid hormone runs the body's metalbolism.
When your body doesn't produce enough thyroid hormone, you are HYPOthyroid.
Thyroid hormone plays a role in the functioning of every body organ.
When you don't have enough thyroid hormone, so many things can happen.

It is believed that millions of people are hypothyroid and don't know it.

I had to ask my doctor to check my thyroid function.
I'm glad I did.

I have been on thyroid medication for almost a year now.
I FEEL GREAT!

I can drive to Vermont without loading up on caffeine so I don't fall asleep at the wheel.
I can wear shoes without arch support now - my feet don't hurt.
My legs no longer swell and itch.
My eyes are no longer red and irritated - even if I spend long hours on the computer.
I have much less anxiety than I used to have.  I feel calm inside.
I haven't had a bladder or sinus infection.
I feel much more alert.
While my memory isn't perfect, it is MUCH better than it was.
I am much happier and FEEL GREAT!

I wrote this in hope that it might help someone else feel great too!

In addition to what I have already mentioned,
other possible symptoms are:

Fatigue, lack of motivation, sluggishness.
You feel like you have a bad internet connection!


Thinning hair and/or eyebrows.  The outer half of your eyebrows are thin or non-existent.






Weight gain.  This dog and cat are hypothyroid.

High cholesterol.


If you see yourself in at least some of these symptoms, talk to your doctor and get tested.
I wish I had done that years ago!

Did I mention that I feel GREAT?


Thursday, November 10, 2011

Life's A Beach

 Where is the perfect place to go on a warm, sunny day in November?

THE BEACH!


Earlier this week, I spent 3 idyllic hours at the beach.
Just me and my dogs.


It was their first time at the beach.
It's too hot in the summer to take them.
Halle and Sami were VERY excited to be there.


As we walked along the shoreline, Halle kept tugging on the leash as she attempted to chase all of the seagulls perched in large groups on the sand.

The State Cross County Championship was being held at the park on the beach that day.
After each group of runners was finished, they came to the warm sand for a cool-down.


Inevitably, each of them ended up running at full speed into the cool water as they hooted and howled in delight!  It's hard to believe that only a week ago we were trudging through a foot of snow!

I even persuaded the dogs to walk into the ocean, but they wouldn't go any deeper than their bellies!

After walking for a few hours, it was time to head back onto the warm sand and lay down our blanket.
After watching the kids play a game of football...

Sami and Halle were ready for a little nap!

So we sat down to rest.  Ahhhh!  So peaceful and relaxing!

Sami rested his head on the warm sand.
As always, Halle chose to rest her head on me!
I will remember this day for a very long time!
Just me and my dogs!

Thoughts on Loss

We deal with loss nearly every day in one form or another.

Loss of pride
Loss of competition
Loss of hair
Loss of appetite
Loss of eyesight
Loss of keys
Loss of internet
Loss of youth

Luckily, not as often, we deal with other types of losses.

Loss of your home
Loss of a job
Loss of your health
Loss of a loved one
Loss of a pet



This week, our family is dealing with the loss of Tigger.

He's been missing since Saturday (November 5).
He has never been gone for more than one night before this.

This blog entry is not about losing Tigger, though.

It's about how I am FEELING about losing Tigger.

Surprisingly, I'm calm.
AND I DON'T KNOW WHY.
And it's bothering me.

One thought is that I must believe deep down that he will come back.

But what I have really been contemplating is that maybe...
after losing many pets over the years...
after losing both of my parents...
and all of the millions of other little losses in my 52 years...

maybe I am getting better at it.

Maybe I really understand that I am not in control of everything.
Maybe I have learned to be thankful for the time I have had with pets rather than mourn the times that will never be.

Just because I am calm, it doesn't mean I don't care.
Finding Tigger has been a full-time job this week.
Posting signs all over town.
Walking through the streets, calling his name.
Stuffing mailboxes with fliers.
Responding to possible sightings.
Staying up a little later at night and keeping the back porch light on "just in case".
Praying that the next time I walk by the slider, he will be pawing at the glass to come in.

I hope we will see him again.
He has been a really good cat.
He has been loved.

I'll keep you posted.


 







Friday, November 4, 2011

Snow Falling on Cedars, Oaks, Maples, Birch...

Snow falling on leaves is no laughing matter!

We have found out the hard way that there is a good reason why the trees drop their leaves before winter arrives.

It began snowing heavily around 4:00 PM last Saturday.

Less than a half hour later,  all you could hear was the sound of cracking tree limbs and the subsequent sounds as they crashed to the ground.

It was pretty easy to hear them because the house was very quiet.  We had already lost our electricity.

We slept downstairs that night just in case one of those tree limbs from the towering oak trees surrounding our house fell on our roof.  Luckily, this didn't happen.  But I didn't sleep very well that night as the trees kept groaning over the unbearable weight of the snow.


When we woke up the next morning, we were fortunate that our house, shed, and fence were unharmed.  But the poor trees hadn't fared so well.


The tops of these stately oaks were bending under a weight they may have never before carried in all of their years.


This oak in our front yard was bent like a candy cane.









The tops of many trees were broken from the weight of the snow clinging to the fall leaves.



Someone had been out early with a chainsaw to open a path for their car to get out to the main road.



Smaller birch trees bent gracefully to the ground.

As we stood outside surveying the damage, limbs continued to fall around us.


Six days later, the snow has melted.
But the devastation remains.  More than we could have imagined.

We still have no power.  No heat.  No internet.

We go to the mall to charge our phones. 

We go to the shelter at the high school to shower.

Here is just a small glimpse of our neighborhood.  And it is like this all over the state.



 Telephone poles broken in half.

 Electrical wires down over people's driveways.

 Storm shelters offer a warm place to sleep, eat, and shower.







 Cars drive under trees suspended over the road, resting on power lines.
Traffic lights are dark.

Most businesses are closed.
Gas stations can't pump gas without electricity, so there are long lines at the few stations that are open.
Cars need gas, but so do generators. 
Those restaurants that are lucky enough to have power have long waiting lines.

But just as it was in the wake of 9/11 and other disasters, people are talking more to each other.  Strangers are friendlier than usual, commiserating about the lack of power and showers.
People are helping each other survive.

While the lights are out, humanity has been shining!










Wednesday, October 26, 2011

For the Love of Jobs

I have to admit, I was sad on October 5th.

The death of Steve Jobs affected me.

I am a fan of all things Apple.

So are my kids. 





Adam carved this design in his pumpkin this year as a tribute to Steve Jobs.



Adam wasn't the only one that felt the need to make a tribute to Steve Jobs.
Take a look at a few other other creative tributes.........

























“I was worth over $1,000,000 when I was 23, and over $10,000,000 when I was 24, and over $100,000,000 when I was 25, and it wasn’t that important because I never did it for the money.”

“Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me … Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful… that’s what matters to me.” –  as quoted in The Wall Street Journal (Summer 1993).

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” - Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Address