For the first 50 years of my life, my perfectionist self mistakenly believed it was all about knowing more, getting it right, planning, attempting to prevent bad things from happening, and keeping all of my chicks in a row. It took me this long to discover that the JOURNEY is all that matters. This quote from Gilda Radner sums it all up:

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
"


Sunday, December 12, 2010

TRADITION Reconsidered

"Tradition simply means that we need to end what began well and continue what is worth continuing."
 ~Jose Bergamin

Tradition!  My family has always believed in the value of tradition.  There is something special about repeating good times and a security in being able to count on something in the future.   Traditions help us mark the passage of time.  They give us a structure for remembering the past.  


This year, I have realized that we are ready to let go of a few of our long-standing traditions that began many years ago.  One tradition that will not be continued in 2010 is that of having our pets in our Christmas card picture.  In prior years, it was very important to the kids that ALL of our pets be included on our Christmas card.  In the past, we not only had to get the kids looking nice, but the animals too.  The cats lost their patience rather quickly.  Many times, blood flowed after a struggle with an unwilling Mr. Wiggles or MoMo.   Dogs were lured with treats to sit up straight and look at the camera.  We actually eliminated pictures based on how the animals looked!  But in 2010, you will see no animals in our Christmas card picture at all.  And it doesn't seem to matter to anyone anymore.


Since the kids were little, our family has always made Christmas ornaments to give to our family, friends, and teachers.  It began as a way to teach the kids that Christmas is not all about what you get, and it is important to give of yourself during this season also.  So every year I came up with a hand-made ornament that we could all work on together.  We would put on Christmas music and have an assembly line as we worked on 50+ ornaments.  We began around Thanksgiving and were lucky to have all of them done before Christmas.  Then they were packaged and wrapped and the kids would proudly give them out to teachers and family.  As the kids got older,  I found that I was the only one working on them - the collaborative effort was gone.  The meaning was gone.  So this year marks the end of this tradition too.






Traditionalists are pessimists about the future and optimists about the past. 
~Lewis Mumford 
I found the about quote very interesting.   While traditions help pull a family together,  they can be limiting and prevent us from moving on possibly to better things.  They make us focus on the past.  It is more important to focus on the present and the future.  

With two of my children away at college and one left at home with us,  it seems that traditions are less important to all of us this year.  We just want to be home together.  We are ready to move on to a new stage of our lives and welcome new experiences and new people.   We are excited to spend time with Adam's new girlfriend, Sam, and hopefully make her feel the love and caring that our family has for each other.  We love having Kerry's friend Jojo at our house - she is like another daughter to us - and many other friends too.  We are optimistic about the future and all it holds for our family.  Maybe some new traditions will begin. 

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