Gayle Tales

For the first 50 years of my life, my perfectionist self mistakenly believed it was all about knowing more, getting it right, planning, attempting to prevent bad things from happening, and keeping all of my chicks in a row. It took me this long to discover that the JOURNEY is all that matters. This quote from Gilda Radner sums it all up:

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. "

Thursday, January 12, 2012

If I Had a Hammer...

Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we’re wired that way.

Because without it, I don’t know…

maybe we just wouldn’t feel real.

What’s that saying?

“Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?”

“Because it feels so good when I stop.”

~ Meredith Grey

Beginning a running program at the age of 52 has not been easy.

I started running/walking in November.
Fifteen runs later, and I still feel like crap.

My legs.
My mother used to call me her "little pony" because I had long, skinny legs and could run so easily.

I'm no pony anymore!
Gone are the long, graceful strides of just a few years ago too.
My legs feel more like those of ...

an elephant!

Only I'm sure an elephant can run much faster than me.

Over the last few days, my legs have been aching after I run.
So tonight I decided to google
"starting a running program after the age of 50"
for some tips.

I found a really good article accompanied by the following picture:

This is not exactly what I picture myself looking like...
However, good for those OLD ladies! You go, girls!

The article described the highs of running:

Your arms, legs, and breathing fall into a rhythm that eventually lulls your brain into a meditative "no-stress zone".

My runs are anything but meditative right now!
And my breathing can more aptly be described as
"sucking wind".
It has no rhythm.

I can remember the days of yesteryear when I would get lost in thought as I jogged along.

Now my brain has no room for thoughts other than making sure I put one foot in front of the other and lift my heavy legs high enough not to trip and fall flat on my face when the sidewalk is uneven.

Run only when you're pain free.

Bad idea! If I kept to this one, I would never run at all!

I'm sure there are those of you reading this who are young and thinking to themselves
"I will never let myself get THAT out of shape".

I remember saying the same thing about my mother.
That was BEFORE.

Before what?

Before SO MANY things that you are yet to experience.

So, why will I keep running, despite pain and suffering it entails?

Because "it feels so good when I stop"!

______________________________________________

My jogging log (new entries in red)

13:18 min 1.04 mile 12:47 min/mile
12:29 min 1.05 miles 11:53 min/mile
14:53 min 1.24 miles 12:00 min/mile
12:34 min 1.06 miles 11:51 min/mile
15:08 min 1.37 miles 11:02 min/mile
16:46 min 1.45 miles 11:34 min/mile
16:07 min 1.44 miles 11:12 min/mile
16:20 min 1.40 miles 11:40 min/mile

15:54 min 1.40 miles 11:21 min/mile

15:03 min 1.40 miles 10:40 min/mile

15:39 min 1.40 miles 11:11 min/mile
15:25 min 1.40 miles 10:51 min/mile
15:28 min 1.40 miles 11:03 min/mile

Monday, January 9, 2012

The House is Sinking!

Have nothing in your house that you do not know

to be useful, or believe to be beautiful. --William Morris

When my husband read my blog entry with my running times, he couldn't understand why I would willingly let anyone to know how out-of-shape I am!

Well, here I go again.

When you look at the above picture,
how does it make you feel?

How about this one?

When I see these pictures, I feel very uncomfortable!

Clutter.

Lack of order.

I hate it.

In fact, for me, OUTER ORDER contributes to INNER CALM.

I am ashamed to admit that these pictures were taken in MY basement.

How does it get this way?

Every winter I spend a day or two organizing the basement and putting things back where they belong.

In past years, I have bought organization systems.

I label everything so everyone knows where to find things.
And where to put them back.

BUT, they NEVER get put back where they belong.

This doesn't bother ANYONE ELSE IN MY HOUSE!
Heck, my kids bedrooms generally don't look
much different than this!

When my kids were younger,
I called them together and told them
I had gotten a phone call from town hall.
The town told me our house was too heavy
and was beginning to sink into the ground!
I gave them each a garbage bag so they
could help us save the house from going under!
They had to decide what they could part with.

(This was one of my shining moments of motherhood!)

Being children who still believed that Santa could
fit gifts for the entire world into his little sleigh -
naive about weights and measures -
they fell for it!

Oh, the pleasure I derived from this little project!

Now that they are older, I can't fool them anymore.

So I keep the doors to their bedrooms shut
and do the best I can.

But they have the advantage.
It's 4 of them to 1 of me.

Tomorrow I'll organize the basement once again.
Maybe this year it will stay that way!

____________________________________________
My jogging log (new entries in red)

13:18 min 1.04 mile 12:47 min/mile
12:29 min 1.05 miles 11:53 min/mile
14:53 min 1.24 miles 12:00 min/mile
12:34 min 1.06 miles 11:51 min/mile
15:08 min 1.37 miles 11:02 min/mile
16:46 min 1.45 miles 11:34 min/mile
16:07 min 1.44 miles 11:12 min/mile
16:20 min 1.40 miles 11:40 min/mile

15:54 min 1.40 miles 11:21 min/mile

15:03 min 1.40 miles 10:40 min/mile

15:39 min 1.40 miles 11:11 min/mile

Friday, January 6, 2012

Momma, Don't Take My Kodachrome Away

"Kodachrome, it gives us those nice bright colors
Gives us the greens of summers
Makes you think all the world's a sunny day, oh yeah!
I got a Nikon camera, I love to take a photograph
So momma, don't take my Kodachrome away..."

~Paul Simon, Kodachrome

I began taking an online photography course
on Photographic Composition this week.

It's all about composing better pictures.
It's about seeing things, noticing things.

Noticing patterns,
               lines,
               light,
               shadow,
               repetition.

The first assignment was to go outside
and take pictures of these things.

So I went on a hike and stopped in one area.
And I looked around.
I looked high and low.
I stayed in one spot and looked in every direction.

It's amazing how much you see when you try.

Oh, and I forgot to mention...
The pictures have to be black and white.

There were interesting lines and patterns on the railroad trestle.

A stone stuck in the pedestrian crossing grate.

This bolt was holding the railing.
Yikes!

Without color, it's easier to notice light and shadow.

There was a nice pattern of light and shadow on the stones
behind the tree.

The bridge from below.
Patterns of lines and squares.

Without leaves, it's easy to see shapes in the branches.

Lichen on tree bark.

A pretty, curly vine.

A single red berry.

Concentric circles in the top of a log.

The sun came out briefly and helped create
patterns of light and shadow.

An old piece of farm machinery -
I'm not sure what it's purpose was.
It's not a wheel because I could see the
rubber tire on the wheel.
Any ideas?

A perfect letter "e" on the ground.

The posts and their shadows form a nice
set of lines.

Downed tree limbs form an "x"
as the sun shines through.

I had a lot of fun with this assignment.

Black and white photography forces you to
take pictures differently.

It makes you notice shapes, light, and shadow.

Sometimes color can be distracting.

But if I had to choose between the two...

I'd go with color every time.

______________________________________

13:18 min 1.04 mile 12:47 min/mile
12:29 min 1.05 miles 11:53 min/mile
14:53 min 1.24 miles 12:00 min/mile
12:34 min 1.06 miles 11:51 min/mile
15:08 min 1.37 miles 11:02 min/mile
16:46 min 1.45 miles 11:34 min/mile
16:07 min 1.44 miles 11:12 min/mile
16:20 min 1.40 miles 11:40 min/mile
15:54 min 1.40 miles 11.21 min/mile

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Pride and Accountability

Ok.

I used to be an active person.

I used to bike, play tennis, cross country ski, downhill ski,
and jog.

During the years that we were trying to start our family,
I started running to relieve the stress of infertility.

Once I finally became pregnant, I stopped running.

Being a stay-at-home mom to 3 active kids,
I did a lot of running around, but not really exercise.

I skated...

I still went biking....

I played hopscotch and jump rope.
I would swim a little bit in the summer...

As they got bigger, we would go on family bike rides -
but only as fast the the youngest child could go.
I started exercise programs, but nothing lasted.
Other responsibilities would always get in the way
- or so I told myself.

I have belonged to LA Fitness for the past 2 years or so.
I usually get serious about it before bathing suit season.
But it takes so much time to go to the gym every day
that I can't sustain it for an extended period.

So last month, as it became impossible to zip up
my jeans once again, I knew I had to do something
that was easier to sustain and didn't take so much time.

I started running.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A PICTURE OF ME!
It is a picture of what I would like to look like!

My first day out, I ran less than 1/2 mile and stopped 5 times.

I was disgusted with myself.
I felt old.

Then I found an APP for my iPhone that really motivates me.
It's called LogYourRun.

It uses GPS to keep track of your mileage.

I can listen to songs and it interrupts the song every quarter mile
to tell me how far I have gone.

And it keeps track of my distance, speed, and effort.

I started using it my second time out..........

19:13 min 0.9 miles 22:05 min/mile

and I stopped 3 times to walk.

Pretty bad.
But it has motivated me.
That, and watching the contestants on the Biggest Loser
       run a marathon!

Since then, here are my stats.

13:18 min       1.04 mile    12:47 min/mile
12:29 min 1.05 miles 11:53 min/mile
14:53 min 1.24 miles 12:00 min/mile
12:34 min 1.06 miles 11:51 min/mile
15:08 min 1.37 miles 11:02 min/mile
16:46 min 1.45 miles 11:34 min/mile
16:07 min 1.44 miles 11:12 min/mile
16:20 min 1.40 miles 11:40 min/mile

I am seeing progress.
I definitely slowed down after eating all those
         Christmas goodies!

But I am not stopping to walk anymore.
And I have increased my mileage - somewhat.

Now I am going to use my PRIDE to keep me going.

EVERY TIME I WRITE A BLOG ENTRY,
I WILL LOG MY RUNS.

I will be accountable to you.

I hate to lose.
I hate to say I can't do something.
I hate to give up -

especially when someone is watching.

So wish me luck.
And get on me if I slack off.

Monday, January 2, 2012

Let Time Stand Still

Time flies. Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us wants is more time. Time to stand up. Time to grow up. Time to let go. Time. ~Dr. Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

Today was quite a day for TIME.

Today was a new day,

... a new week,

... a new month,

... a new year.

How did I spend my TIME today, January 1, 2012?

My day began with a dream. A nice dream.
In fact, I didn't want to wake up.
I dreamed I was visiting my mom and dad - and they were both alive and well.
They say dreams come and go in an instant.
Thankfully this dream seemed to last a long TIME.

I didn't do a whole lot today.
I didn't shower.
I didn't even get out of my pajamas.

Some people would say I wasted TIME today.

Around two o'clock, I went upstairs to a bedroom
at the farthest end of the house and crawled under
the comforter and      fell    asleep.

Over the next 4 hours I went in and out of sleep.

I heard my dogs walk in and check to see if I was awake.

Each time I woke up, I thought I should get up
            and accomplish something.

Then I decided not to.
And I drifted back to sleep.

It was already dark when I finally awoke for good.
I stayed warm and content under the covers, listening.
I heard the TV downstairs.
I heard my husband ask my daughter if she was hungry.
The door to my son's room opened and I smiled to myself
           as I heard his stomping footsteps go downstairs.
My guess is that he had been sleeping too.
I wondered what Annie was doing.
I wondered if anyone knew where I was.

As I lay there, I reflected on the past year.
I mused over the possibilities of this new year.

But mostly, I just basked in the present moment...

My family is home, together.
We are all healthy and happy.

Let TIME stand still for today.

It doesn't get any better than this.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Savoring Christmas

Acclaimed French photographer Marc Riboud says,

“Photography is about savoring life at 1/100th of a second.”

This blog is about savoring Christmas 2011
at 1/100th of a second!

I am really into wool felt this year.
I had so much fun sewing new stockings for all of us!

Then I put my dogs' fur to good use.
I combined their fur with colored wool
that I purchased at the craft store to make
a garland of felted balls.

These are the balls before they went through the
washer and dryer.

These are the felted balls strung into a garland.
Halle and Sami's fur if the brown/tan color.

I also made a runner for my table using medallions of
birch that I cut from the trees that fell during last month's
storm.

My family spent a quiet Christmas Eve alone at home
opening gifts from our stockings.